Monday, February 27, 2012

Tender Mercies

“But behold, I, Nephi, will show unto you that the tender mercies of the Lord are over all those whom he hath chosen, because of their faith, to make them mighty even unto the power of deliverance”
(1 Ne. 1:20)

It's election week here at Utah State. 
It's always an interesting week for me. 
Two years ago, I was among those running for office.
And then I didn't win. 
At first, it was hard. 
It hurt. 
But as time has gone on, the more I've realized that it's what needed to happen. 
Mom said it perfectly today. 
Sometimes losing is winning. 
In the years since that election, everything has slowly fallen together. 
I've had my ups and downs, everyone has, but in the end, it's all working out.

If I had won, who knows what would have happened. 
That year got super dramatic among officers.
I would not have had the time to be involved in the things I ended up with. 
I would not be in the job at Athletics that I am. 
I would not be in the position to continue my education at Utah State. 
I would not be on the same career path. 

There would have been positives too, but in the end,
I'm glad I didn't win. 
I am in a much better spot now because of it. 

It's funny how things work out. 
Answers to prayers come in funny ways. 
I needed to run. I know that. 
I learned a lot from it. 
I grew. 
But it needed to end the way it did. 

"Some may count this experience as simply a nice coincidence, but I testify that the tender mercies of the Lord are real and that they do not occur randomly or merely by coincidence. Often, the Lord’s timing of His tender mercies helps us to both discern and acknowledge them ... Through personal study, observation, pondering, and prayer, I believe I have come to better understand that the Lord’s tender mercies are the very personal and individualized blessings, strength, protection, assurances, guidance, loving-kindnesses, consolation, support, and spiritual gifts which we receive from and because of and through the Lord Jesus Christ."
(The Tender Mercies of the Lord - David A. Bednar, 2005)

Saturday, February 25, 2012


And just like that, another home basketball season has come to a close.
It has been a very... confusing... season.
Utah State has been spoiled these last few years, so when things changed, it came as a shock to everyone.
Rather than ending the season at 30-4, we'll be lucky if we can finish over .500.
That's what happens when you lose six seniors.
We had to start over.

The entire season has been a roller coaster ride.
It was one full of rebuilding.

It has been an interesting year for me, being on the other side of it all.
In the past, I spent so many hours waiting in the Spectrum, earning my second row seat.
In the three seasons I was in Section F, I made some great friends and lived my dream college life.
Now things are different.
I wear a dress to games.
I sit quietly on the press or scorers table.
I have to focus on specific things and can't yell and scream.
It took some getting used to, but now that is what I love.

I see everything from an entirely different perspective.

On Monday, I was preparing myself for tonight to be my last home game as a student.
Luckily, by Tuesday, that had all changed.
I can't wait for another two years.

For 45 minutes before every game, I stand at the door selling programs.
I see the entire range of Aggie fans.
There are the newborn babies who have no clue what is going on.
There are the young kids who are enthralled by everything that is happening around them.
They are decked out in blue, and just so excited.
There are the college students.
The high school kids who come, dreaming of the day they can join the college kids.
There are the young alumni.
The old alumni.
There is a man I talk to at every game who helped build the Spectrum.
He and his wife have sat in the same seats at every game for 45 years.

There is the man who always reminds me to smile.
There's Dale.
Dale isn't all the way there.
He is so friendly and chatty.
Every night, he asks if I have a boyfriend yet.
When I say no, he tells me I'd better get on it.
There are the "regulars."
The ones who buy a program every week.
There's the university president.
The football coaches.

We know each other.
These people represent what it is to be an Aggie.

It doesn't matter how the team is doing.
It doesn't matter that we've lost more times at home this year than we have in the last six years combined.
What matters is that we're there.
We love our team. We love our school.
That is the magic of the Spectrum.
That is the magic of Utah State.

Wednesday, February 22, 2012

24 Hours

24 hours ago I had no idea what I was doing with my life.
And now, it's all falling into place. 

I got brave and sent my boss an email, asking about the possibility of me continuing to work for the department.
Turns out they like me.
And think I'm worth keeping around.
(even people who I didn't know knew me)

Moral of the story is
I get to be an Aggie for two more years.
And the athletic department is going to pay for it
while I keep doing what I've been doing.
What I LOVE.

Now granted, this opens up all sorts of new questions.
What do I get a master's in
(right now it's looking like I'll just join the other GAs in their program)
Where do I live? With who?

While those things are stressful
it's nothing compared to the stress I had been feeling.
Things are falling into place.
And it feels great.