Monday, November 26, 2012

Then & Now

The last few nights, my sleep has been filled with flashback-like dreams.

One night was devoted to the days of working at the Marana Texas Roadhouse.
I wasn't necessarily re-living it, just continuing.
All the same people were back and working.
It was like nothing had changed.

There were two different nights of my high school life.
One of soccer.
Another of my choir and drama groups.

There were appearances by people I haven't seen or talked to in years.

It was all very strange.
And it got me thinking.

As a whole person, I wouldn't say I'm much different than I was in high school.
Physically and otherwise, I feel pretty much the same...

I mean, I've cut back a bit on the eye makeup, but other than that... I even still wear these clothes! 
For your entertainment(?) here are the rest of the senior pics... 

But as I thought about it, I'm really such a different person now than I was then. 
I'm doing things and going in a direction I never imagined. 

For one, my career path is completely different.
As a senior in high school I was still set on the whole medical field idea. 
I played soccer, but that's about it as far my sports involvement was concerned. 

Now? That's all my life revolves around. 
I work in sports.
I watch sports.
I choose to listen to sports radio.
Say what??
I never would have thought. 

Like any typical teenage girl, I was sure I'd be at a different stage in my life than I actually am. 
We grow up thinking, surely, I'll go to school, get a couple years in, find that special someone and live happily ever after. 
Well, here I am, 4 1/2 years later, and I'm happy and working toward that ever after, just on my own so far. 
And that's completely ok. 
Sure, the list of "People I Never Thought Would Get Married Before Me" is always growing, but it's cool. 
Just means my guy is going to be that much more awesome. 

As a senior, I thought Marana would always be home. 
That's where I would return to for holidays. 
That's where my parents would always live and familiarity would always be. 
So much for that. 
Now my parents live in a small town. They are the only people I know. 
When I go 'home' it's to be with my family and that's it. 
It has it's pros and cons, for sure, but there's nothing I can do about it. 


While not much of anything has gone as I expected, I'm grateful for it. 
The experiences I've had and the decisions I've made have made me who I am. 
And guess what?
I kind of like her. 

Wednesday, November 21, 2012

Wednesday, November 14, 2012

Monday, November 12, 2012


I overthink
And overreact.

I forget that I can't make other people's decisions for them.

I am sarcastic and snarky,
Often at inappropriate times.

I tend to speak before I think.

I'm not good at expressing my negative emotions.
I keep them bottled up and put on a happy face.
Then I act crazy and blame things on others, when really no one knows what's going on.

I struggle to find the line between being humble and being gracious.
Sincere compliments are hard for me to accept.

I am impatient.
I am selfish.

I'm scared to grow up.

But this is me.
I'm flawed.
I'm far from perfect.
I strive to be better, but can't do it on my own.

But you, my someone (wherever and whoever you are), this is where you come in.
You love me anyway.
In fact, you love me because of it.
Not in spite of it.
Together, we work. We will become better with each other.

Wednesday, November 7, 2012

Monday, November 5, 2012

Aggie Spirit

You guys. I love my school.
So, so much. 

This was a crazy week in the world of Aggie athletics. 
We hosted the WAC soccer tournament. 
There was a home football game as well as basketball games for both teams. 
Volleyball was also playing on the road. 

It meant a lot of work hours. 
A lot of caffeine and not a lot of sleep. 

But let me tell you, there's something special about this place. 

It was just the second basketball game (and an exhibition at that) and already, the magic of the Spectrum is back. 
As I sold programs I talked to the regulars. 
The man who helped build the Spectrum and has sat in the same seat at every game for 47 years. 
The man who always reminds me to smile. 
The one always asking if I have a boyfriend yet. 
The kids who are there for their first time. 
The feeling in the air of the new season. 

To be there, having come straight from a football game where we destroyed yet another opponent was great. 
The fact that it's November, the sun was still shining, and our team was still winning was a whole series of miracles regarding Aggie football. 
For the first time since 1978, Utah State has won 8 football games. 
We are well on our way to one of the most successful seasons ever. 

The Utah State soccer team are the WAC CHAMPS!
This afternoon they defeated No. 19 Denver to claim the title and an automatic NCAA Tournament bid. 
Those girls have worked so hard and deserve this.
They have an incredible program. 

With a win over New Mexico State yesterday, the volleyball team has at least a share of the WAC title. 
They have just two matches left, and unless something goes terribly wrong, the title is theirs. 

When you have this much success in just a four-day stretch, it makes the long days worth it. 
While people were tired, everything went smoothly and no one was stressed. 
We enjoyed our work. 

As the soccer team celebrated their win today, and had so many fans celebrate with them, I couldn't help but get a little emotional. 
The support for these athletic programs, regardless of their success, is amazing to watch. 

(photo credit: Amber Rae Childers... who doesn't know I borrowed this)

I love Utah State. 
My time here has been incredible and something I would be perfectly happy to never see end. 

Friday, November 2, 2012


As much as I adore the month of October, I'm always glad to see the first day of November. 
Once my birthday happens, I'm ready to move on. 
Most people know this about me, but I really don't like Halloween.
Like, at all.

As I went through high school and college, the whole day just became more and more about how slutty and misbehaving as you can be. 
I went to the Howl last year, but solely for the concert. 
I came, I saw, I got the heck out of there. 

It's just not my thing. 
It's fine if it's your thing, though. 

Some day, I'll have babies of my own who I'll be able to dress up and put in adorable costumes. 
I'll take them trick-or-treating and it will be lovely. 
They'll be precious and they'll be mine. 

Then I'll enjoy Halloween. 

The actual day was great.
Did the whole work thing all day, all in anticipation for the evening. 

Hit up the gym and Walmart (which were both DEAD, so that was beautiful). 
Spent some time handing out candy and stuff at Shelby's mom's house, then it was on to the best part of the day. 
The night so many of us have been waiting for for so long... 


Of the Jazz regular season that is. 
The game was great.
I'm in love with our new team and the system. 
Should be an excellent season. 

And now we're on to November. 
While it's not as beautiful and glamorous as October, it's still pretty great. 

-This freakin' election will finally be over in just a few days. 
- It's No-Shave November! I love the first couple weeks of this month because I love the scruffy early days of the facial hair. 
- Now I can listen to Christmas music even more and with fewer people judging me. 

All good things!
Bring on November.