Friday, December 31, 2010

Auld Lang Syne

Should auld acquaintance be forgot,
And never brought to mind? 

I'm not one to make resolutions...


Should auld acquaintance be forgot, 

And auld lang syne! 


Instead, I look back on the year that is ending...

For auld lang syne, my dear, 
For auld lang syne. 

I think of the lessons learned, the friendships made, and the experiences gained...

We'll take a cup o' kindness yet,
For auld lang syne.  

And look forward to the year to come. Hoping to learn more, make new friendships and strengthen the ones I already have, and to experience many new and exciting things. 

2011? Bring it on

The Best Three Years

My years in college have hands-down been the best years of my life.

I've made amazing friends...



(haha sorry girl, there aren't pictures of us! What the heck??)




All of them are incredible and I wouldn't be who I am without each of them.
I hope they all know how much they mean to me.
Love you!!

When I haven't been busy having adventures with these people, I've been busy learning.
Learning in the actual sense of furthering my education, yes, but it's been a lot more than that too.
I've learned A LOT about myself.
And that learning continues each and every day.

So here's to you, college.
You rock my socks.

Thursday, December 30, 2010

Words from the Wise

i can be extraordinary
(ramona quimby, age 8)

That's what I keep telling myself.
(as I sit watching this movie for the second time in three days)


I wish I knew what I was doing.

I'm tired of things not working out the way I hope or imagine they will.

I'm tired of being passed over for job and internship opportunities.
(happened yet again today)


It scares me to try and get where I want (wherever that may be) without having these starts.
(plus, how will I know if it's what I want to do if I haven't actually tried it??)

I just want to be successful.


Failure (or even the possibility of it) terrifies me.


I don't know what I'm doing with my life.


I hate Taylor Swift, but she put it perfectly...


I don't know what I want,
So don't ask me
'cause I'm still trying to figure it out.
Don't know what's down this road,
I'm just walking, trying to see through the rain coming down.

I just want everything to work out.
Is that too much to ask?


i can be extraordinary

A Different Sort of Letter

Dear Boys, 


Yes, I am writing letters to whichever one of you lucky ones is eventually going to be mine forever. However, the past couple of days, I have been having less-than-romantic thoughts towards you. 


To put it simply, your gender kind of sucks sometimes. 


No offense. 


Mostly I just wish you wouldn't be so bloody confusing. 


And I know, I know, you'll all just say we're the confusing ones, which we can be, I'll be honest. But most the time, it's all you. 


Y'all are just so hard to read. Things are going splendidly all evening, all signs pointing in good directions, then, nothing


What gives dudes? 


Enough of this whole leading us on thing.


I can't handle the games anymore.
Especially the ones that last for four years. 



But really.
I quit.

J'abandonne.

Mr. Right, where are you?



Apparently I "just haven't met you yet," because any time I hear anyone's successful happily ever after story, there aren't any games. There aren't any questions. Supposedly you just know or whatever. 


Well I don't know anything yet, so that's that. 
I wish I was better with  the whole patience virtue... 


And now I'm going to go to bed.
I'm going to fall asleep to the greatest love songs out there.

Wishing they were being sung to/about me.
(or maybe I should focus on the not-so-loving songs?)

Love... (maybe... not quite there yet),
Megan

Monday, December 27, 2010

A Little Letter

I'm in love with THIS blog.
It's simple, it's sweet, and we have the same name. (she just spells hers different).
She's beautiful, as is her writing.

Every once in awhile she posts quick letters to her future husband, whoever/wherever he may be.
She informs him of things he should know about her.
Things that may seem quirky, but make her great.
I love it.

So here is the first of my letters to my Mr. Right.

Dear husband-to-be,

 you should know...

I squeeze the toothpaste from the middle of the tube.

I will melt when you call me Meg. Not many people can get away with that.

I love the 4th of July and my birthday the very most. 
However, I hate Valentine's Day. I really don't want to celebrate it. Instead, surprise me on another random night and let's celebrate then instead.

I want you to pick my ring.
I'll drop some hints about things I like, but I think our relationship should be at the point where you know me well enough to know what I love. 
We can talk about it, but I don't want to know when the proposal is coming. 
I want it to be a complete surprise.

I am a night owl. I would rather stay up til 3 than wake up at 7.

Want to make my day? Bring me a fountain Diet Coke (or Dr. Pepper). 
It's as simple as that.

I will never get tired of watching You've Got Mail and Sleepless in Seattle.
I hope you're ok with that.

I love old movies and musicals.

I love you, but will need my space.
I want you to have yours as well.
Make sure we have our time apart, doing our own things we love.

Make sure we have the same friends, but keep our own as well.
This will only bring us closer.

Dress up.
It's sexy.

On the flip-side, I also think the post-basketball (or whatever), sweaty, messy you is also sexy.

Sing to me. Even if you can't.
Same thing applies with dancing.

Promise me we'll have a weekly date night.
They don't have to be elaborate though, just time together.
Take me to the temple often. Have prayer and scripture study with me and our eventual kidlets.

I often wonder about who you are... Where you are...
Do I already know you?
Or are you far away from me?

When will you come into my life?


Love, always and forever,
Meg

Reminiscence Part 4


Picture waking up to the sound of a paintball gun going off (only you don't realize that's what it is...)
In the morning, you look outside and see a splat like this one (only mine was lime green) on your bedroom window.
Small traces of this bright green still remain on my window screen.

Now, some people may be upset by this random act of "vandalism," but for me it was an awesome realization.
I have some great friends.

It hasn't been confirmed, but I'm pretty sure Elder Brown and Elder Wilson were the culprits.

This is just one example of the shenanigans my friends and I would get involved in.
There were countless injuries, run-ins with police, and crazy nights, but I wouldn't trade any of them for the world.

My junior and senior years were incredible. Especially after my sophomore year.
These were the years I got really close with these people who changed my life.
They are people I hope will be a part of my life forever.
(maybe some in different ways than others...?)

There weren't many girls my age in our group, but that was entirely ok.
Age didn't matter.
We all stuck together as friends, as family.

The boys all went on to serve missions, but are slowly returning home to our desert.

Everyone is off at school... UofA, Pima, BYU, EA, Utah State, etc.
We don't see each other a lot, but the times that we do get to come back together are some of the best.
We play soccer and dodgeball, the boys do a good job of trying to hurt each other, we laugh and have a fantastic time.

They are wonderful people and each one of them holds a small piece of my heart.
I honestly don't know where or who I'd be if it weren't for them.

Reminiscence Part 3

No picture for this one... But a big part of my reminiscence comes from some of the clothes remaining in my closet.

Some, like a few pair of jeans and my madrigals dress from high school, fit better now than they did then.

One outfit that remains on the old hangers is my uniform from Central Singers.
9th grade was legit.

We were the rulers of the school.
We all thought we were so cool.
I was involved in a wide range of things...
choir, National Academic League & Geography Olympiad, and I "ran" track.
ok, let's be honest, we all did track solely for the social life that came along with it. 

I got good grades, and was close with my teachers.
Junior High was the years of Ms. Bullock and Mr. Hunt.
They were my math teachers, my gym teachers and coaches, and my mentors.
They made things we didn't normally like fun and interesting. 

I had some incredible friends.
Our group was together all the time.
We were practically inseparable. 

Then I moved. 

But this is where one of the whole "blessings in disguise" thing came along. 
Once high school started, our little group ended up kind of dissolving.
Drama got in the way of things and split everyone apart.
To this day, a lot of them won't even talk to each other. 

However, I am still close with each one of them.
Because I wasn't there, I wasn't involved in the drama.
I didn't fight with anyone, in fact, we just got closer. 

The boys will be coming home from their missions soon
(and Brad will be up in Logan!!) 
and I can't wait to reconnect with them. 

These were also the years spent at scout camp.
As much as I resisted it at first, I ended up loving it.
For the most part.

I really didn't love being the boss' kids.
I loved being up there with my family and spending that time with them,
but there was always some level of scrutiny that came with it.
I was always under a more careful watch from all sides of it than everyone else.

But overall, it was an incredible experience.
Yet another family.

8th and 9th grade were kind of awesome. 

Reminiscence Part 2

I read this book for the first time in 5th grade.

(by the way, I've read it at least 12 times since then...)

That year ended up having a huge influence on me. 
5th grade was my favorite year of school. 
It was Miss Adamson's first year teaching, but you wouldn't have known it if you watched her teach. 

She read us Ella Enchanted, The Witch of Blackbird Pond (another favorite) and made it all so magical. 
5th grade was the year I discovered my passion for history, especially of America... Colonial times, the Civil War, and WWII. To this day, I love it all, thanks to her. 

That was the year we almost moved to the East Coast.
She was there.
That was the year my grandma died.
She was there. 

She was always there. She was my hero that year and I will always admire her. 
We've stayed close and I love that.
I want to be like her when I grow up. 



Reminiscence Part 1

Ok so that whole decade challenge thing turned out to be a lot harder than I thought it would be. But being home this week has led me to a lot of memories and thinking about the past few years. I've decided to combine most of the rest in this post, using the things I've found in my old bedroom.

I put these babies on for the first time in a few years the other night...

 (p.s, did y'all know I did the whole dance thing? Yep, 10 years of my life of ballet, jazz and tap!)

Anyway. 
My feet have grown a bit.
My ankles aren't nearly as strong as they used to be. 
But putting on these shoes took me back to those years...

I started dancing when I was three and continued until the end of 6th grade. 
My years spent in Nanette's basement were incredible. 
I made some amazing friends.
(all of whom are married/engaged now... weird...)
It was a way to stay in shape, feel pretty and graceful, and have a good time. 

Nanette was a sort of second mother to all of us.
There were about an average of 50 girls who came through her studio each year, but she loved each of us as if we were her own daughters.
Every other year our Christmas performance was based off the Nativity. 
Each age group portrayed a portion of the famous scene:
lambs, cows, shepherds & wisemen, angels, and of course Mary

The first year Lisa  and I were en pointe, we got to do a duet as the Angel(s) Gabriel. 
It was magical. 

I miss those years.
When we were dancing, we were carefree and loving it.


Friday, December 24, 2010

Decade Challenge 1/10

I've decided to do this by school year, rather than calendar year... As I've been thinking about the last 10 years, I've realized it's easier to think about them in terms of grade/age. Memories are more prominent to me that way. Plus as I've thought about them all, there haven't really been any completely terrible years that went January to January.

Overall, I guess the "worst" year would have been 2005-2006. 

I was 15. A sophomore in high school.

That was the year that I thought my life was over. 
That was the year of the move from Utah to Arizona. 

Now, in retrospect, it was the best thing that could have happened. As the years went on, I saw how much I needed it. But little 15-year-old me didn't think so. 

I had been at what I then thought was the perfect point in my life. I had my friends, choir, everything. 
I was less than thrilled when we left.

That was the longest school year of my life.
I moved in to groups of friends that had been established for years. 
Though the walls opened up eventually, it took time to find my way in. 
I was new to a place that was familiar and comfortable to everyone else. 

I was in a land where Christmas wasn't white. It was 65 degrees.
I was away from everyone and everything I had ever known.
I was 15 and good at it. 
I was miserable. 

However, by the next August, things had changed...

People came into my life who helped me realize it would all be ok. 
They helped me reflect on the year and realize the good that had come from it.
I hope these people realize how important they are to me.

I started to find myself among people who I knew cared and were there for me.
I spent some time with some of those people tonight. 
I have been working on this post in my head for most of the day, so it was interesting to watch my friends from that perspective. The relationship I have with all of them has changed so much over the last five years. Each of them had a part in making me the person I am today. 

So going at this in the "at the time" view of things, 2005-2006 was definitely the worst of the last 10 years. However, I learned a lot and I know for a fact I wouldn't be the Megan I am today if I hadn't experienced that year. 

And Faf, you were right. This whole thing is emotionally exhausting... I was going to try and do two years tonight... Nope. It's bedtime. 

Sunday, December 19, 2010

10 Years is a Long Time...

I'm sitting in my bed...
The soft fleece from my blanket rubbing against my freshly-shaven legs...
Still warm from the bubble bath and peppermint hot chocolate...
Watching my favorite episode of Little House on the Prairie... (the one where Laura and Almanzo finally get married. Seriously. Greatest love story EVER.)
Listening to the rain hit my Christmas-lit window...
Thinking about how much I want to be home...
And looking back on the last 10 years.

A lot has happened in that time. 

At the beginning of this stretch, I was 11.
Now I'm 21.

At the start, I lived in Utah.
Then Arizona.
Now Utah again.


I've had three and a half different majors.
And finally figured out what I want to do with my life.


I've had my ups and downs.
I've learned who I am; what I like and what I don't, what I want and what I don't. 
I've changed my mind on some of those things. 


I've made some incredible friends.
Many I'm still friends with, many I'm not.


I'm almost 100 percent a different person here at the end of 2010 as I was at the end of 2000. 
The world has changed just as much.


I was planning to get started on this tonight, but I've decided it's too much to think about right now. 
My worst year?
My best?

I guess we'll have to see. 


Last night I ended a conversation with someone around this time, thinking I was going to bed. 
A few minutes later, I got into a good heart-to-heart conversation.

That didn't actually end until 4:30. 
So worth it. 

But not tonight. It's time for bed.  

Saturday, December 18, 2010

The Last Decade: A New Blog Challenge

My good friend Matt Faf came up with an idea for an interesting series of blog posts. I decided to play along, because it will be interesting to reflect and reminisce...


"Start with the worst year of the past decade, and count up until the best. Then by the end of this thing it’ll be just about that time to celebrate the coming of 2011."


I'm now going to go and rank my years, and then get started. Enjoy!

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Day 30 - Finally.

So yes, I realize Day 29 was posted about six days ago, but there's this little thing called Finals Week that got in the way. Don't worry though, I'm DONE! And if I've calculated right, I think I have a 4.0 this semester! That hasn't happened since my sophomore year of high school!

Anyway. Day 30.

Who Am I?
Now, when I say that, this song instantly pops into my head... 


No, I am not Jean Val Jean, 24601, I just thought of it. haha

But really.

I think first and foremost I am an Aggie.


True-blooded, lovin' the spot where the sagebrush grows, all that good stuff.
My experiences here have kind of defined who I am.
I have grown more and truly discovered myself here.
Even if my mind changes daily about the future,
Even if the futures scares me,
I know I'll be ok because of the time I've had here.

****
I am a girl who doesn't care what people think
I am a girl who will do whatever it takes to get where she wants.
I am a girl who just wants to be happy and enjoy life, not necessarily make the most money.
I am a writer.
I am a movie buff, sports fanatic, and hopeless romantic.

****
I love my life and wouldn't have it any other way.

Thursday, December 9, 2010

Studying, writing papers, everything that comes with the week before finals. 
At the same time, I've been watching Gilmore Girls.
The episode of Rory's graduation just ended, and every time I watch it, her valedictorian speech makes me cry...
It fits my life so well.

"My mother never gave me any idea that I couldn't do whatever I wanted to do or be whomever I wanted to be. 
She filled our house with love and fun and books and music, 
unflagging in her efforts to give me role models from Jane Austen to Eudora Welty to Patti Smith Laura Ingalls Wilder to Donny Osmond to Gordon B. Hinckley. 
As she guided me through these incredible 18 21 years, 

I don't know if she ever realized that the person
I most wanted to be was her
."


Wednesday, December 8, 2010

Day 29 - A Picture That Always Makes Me Smile


This was storming the court after winning the outright WAC championship for the third year in a row.
 Running onto that court, with all my favorite people, in my favorite place in the world... 
Nothing better. 

Things We Don't Joke About List

1. The ward activities committee co-chair
2. Carl's Jr.
3. Water buffalo
4. The Things We Don't Joke About List
5. Creepers
6. Ninjas
7. Cake
8. Velociraptors
9. Booting Bob
10. Cookies
11. Tara wanting food

any questions?

Day 28 - A Picture of Me Last Year and Now

last year - age 19 (pre-birthday of '09)
this year - age 21 (just after birthday '10)
Part 2 of the day...
How have I changed?
That's a good question.
How HAVE I changed guys?
(but really, if I know you, I'd love to know what you think)

I think I've become more of myself.
I've always been a very independent person who isn't afraid to do her own thing.
I've always known what I stand for and never waver from that.

But I think in the last year I've begun to do all that even more.
I've found myself in more situations that require me to be me.
I've had opportunities and possibilities come up that really influenced me.

I've really discovered what it is that I love and what I want to do with myself.
I have a clearer picture in my mind of where I want to end up.
I've put myself in positions to help me get there.

There are people who have come into my life
(or maybe just remained in it)
this last year that have helped make me who I am.
They have encouraged me, helped me along, and had a huge influence in my life.
(I hope you know who you are)
I like to think I've played a part in their stories as well.

I like who I am.
I am my own person and not afraid to be such.

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

Meandering

Sometimes I go for walks.
Sometimes those walks are late at night/early in the morning.
It's even better if it's snowing or raining.


I walk to the voices of James Taylor and Carole King.

Sometimes I find myself in the cemetery. 

The rain hits my face, mixing with the tears, making it impossible to tell which belong to the sky and which are mine.

And then I come around a corner...

And see things that remind me it will all be ok.

I read this every time...

because this man is an inspiration.


I walk.
Sometimes for an hour and a half.

I think of the things I wish were different.
The things I want to stay the same.
The things I regret and the things I hope for.
The things and people I miss.

I think. I cry. I pray. I learn. 
I can't wait for next time.

Monday, December 6, 2010

Day 26 - Day 27

A picture of something that means a lot to you...


Yes, the campus means a lot to me, but it's more of what it represents.
I am so lucky to have the chance to be getting this education.
It means so much, and will continue to mean more as I get older.
It also means a lot that it's mostly paid for by other sources. 

A picture of something you’re afraid of...

not necessarily on tests, just in general...

Oh, and these guys.

also just in general. Not a specific kind or anything.


Saturday, December 4, 2010

Day 24/25 - A Picture of Me and a Family Member

Whoever made this thing didn't proofread very well, as days 24 and 25 are the same thing... So here's a picture with me and two of my family members...


Spring Training. Nothing better. Pay $5. Sit on the grass right behind first base. Watch baseball. Done and done. (pretty sure this was a D-Backs/Cubs game during Spring Break of my freshman year at USU)

Oh. And I like this one...

my grandpa's pretty much the bomb.

Yes, Virginia

In 1897, a curious little girl wrote a letter to The Sun, a New York newspaper.

DEAR EDITOR: I am 8 years old.
Some of my little friends say there is no Santa Claus.
Papa says, 'If you see it in THE SUN it's so.'
Please tell me the truth; is there a Santa Claus?"

VIRGINIA O'HANLON.
115 WEST NINETY-FIFTH STREET

Francis Pharcellus Church wrote a reply to Virginia on behalf of the paper. 

"Virginia, your little friends are wrong. They have been affected by the skepticism of a skeptical age. They do not believe except they see. They think that nothing can be which is not comprehensible by their little minds. All minds, Virginia, whether they be men’s or children’s, are little. In this great universe of ours, man is a mere insect, an ant, in his intellect as compared with the boundless world about him, as measured by the intelligence capable of grasping the whole of truth and knowledge.
"Yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus. He exists as certainly as love and generosity and devotion exist, and you know that they abound and give to your life its highest beauty and joy. Alas! how dreary would be the world if there were no Santa Claus! It would be as dreary as if there were no Virginias. There would be no childlike faith then, no poetry, no romance to make tolerable this existence. We should have no enjoyment, except in sense and sight. The eternal light with which childhood fills the world would be extinguished.

"Not believe in Santa Claus! You might as well not believe in fairies. You might get your papa to hire men to watch in all the chimneys on Christmas eve to catch Santa Claus, but even if you did not see Santa Claus coming down, what would that prove? Nobody sees Santa Claus, but that is no sign that there is no Santa Claus. The most real things in the world are those that neither children nor men can see. Did you ever see fairies dancing on the lawn? Of course not, but that’s no proof that they are not there. Nobody can conceive or imagine all the wonders there are unseen and unseeable in the world.
"You tear apart the baby’s rattle and see what makes the noise inside, but there is a veil covering the unseen world which not the strongest man, nor even the united strength of all the strongest men that ever lived could tear apart. Only faith, poetry, love, romance, can push aside that curtain and view and picture the supernal beauty and glory beyond. Is it all real? Ah, Virginia, in all this world there is nothing else real and abiding.
"No Santa Claus! Thank God! he lives and lives forever. A thousand years from now, Virginia, nay 10 times 10,000 years from now, he will continue to make glad the heart of childhood."





What would we have done without Virginia? 

"I'm not just a whimsical figure who wears a charming suit and affects a jolly demeanor. You know, I'm a symbol. I'm a symbol of the human ability to be able to suppress the selfish and hateful tendencies that rule the major part of our lives. If... you can't believe, if you can't accept anything on faith, then you're doomed for a life dominated by doubt."
 - Santa Claus, Miracle on 34th Street

"Seeing is believing, but sometimes the most real things in the world are the things we can't see."
- The Conductor, The Polar Express

"Seeing isn't believing; believing is seeing."
- Judy the Elf, The Santa Clause

Ask yourself this one simple question:

 Do you believe in Santa Claus??

Friday, December 3, 2010

Days 22 & 23

Psych! I'm skipping day 22. A picture that confuses me? That's weird. haha

Day 23 - The Person You've Been Close to the Longest

Now, technically, Erin and I haven't been closest the longest, but she is the best friend I've had for the longest. All growing up, I'm pretty sure I had a different best friend every year. And then came Erin.

People always ask how we met.
The answer?
Facebook. Yep. True story.
The summer before our freshman year, a kid started a group for all of us who had graduated that year and would be coming to Utah State.
We discovered we'd be living in the same building and that we had tons in common. Later into our freshman year  we admitted to each other that we weren't sure how it would go once we actually met, but from the beginning we just clicked.
We finish each others sentences. One of us says one word and we both crack up without anyone else knowing what's going on. We share everything. We used to live together...
And then she went and met Matt. And fell in love in stuff. Whatever. (kidding! Love you both!)
But she's still pretty much the bomb.com
Enjoy the following montage of the awesomeness of us. I'm too lazy to put the stories to them all, but if you want to know, ask.















Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Day 21 - A Picture of Something That Makes Me Happy







All I need...
(it helps anyway...)

Always Just What I Need

There's something so wonderful about the stories of the prophet Joseph Smith's time in Liberty Jail. I mean, it's a terrible experience, but it's definitely my favorite part of Church history to talk about. I learn something new or it at least strikes me a different way every single time.

Today was one of those days.

This story reminds me that my life really isn't that hard. I may get stressed and overwhelmed, (and by may, I of course mean I do), but it really could be a lot worse.

I can't imagine living that life. Joseph had it terrible, but then there's Emma who had to experience a whole other side of it.

It also reminds me that no matter what, Heavenly Father is there. It doesn't matter what my trial might be, he's there to make it easier.

The Joseph Smith movie is easily my favorite movie the Church has put out. It never gets old, there's never a time I don't cry while watching it. I couldn't find the Liberty Jail part in one piece of video, it got split right in the middle... But here it is if you feel like watching it.

It's all great, but the Liberty stuff starts at 9:14 and ends at 5:05 of the second one


I was a crying mess by the end of class, don't even worry. 
Between this and a story Bro. Maughan told, there were few dry eyes in the room.

Institute was really just incredible this week. 
On Monday we talked about everything that will happen at Adam-Ondi-Ahman at the time of the Second Coming. 

Girls, no matter how much you may try to deny it, we can tend to get jealous of the things the men in our lives may get to experience because of the Priesthood. One of those things is the first meeting with all sorts of church leaders; prophets, apostles, and Christ. 

Brother Maughan put it so simply and so beautifully that it doesn't bother me at all. 
"Let the men do our jobs.
 Let us protect you and provide for you.
Let us use our Priesthood for you, for the way it was intended."

Done and done. Men, go do your thing. Just take care of us along the way.